A shadow of favoritism formed over my mom at the birth of her younger sister, Donna. Her parents made the poor choice of comparing the two siblings throughout their lives… even on the most menial tasks. The sting of favoritism ,coupled with comparison, delivered a deadly blow to my Mom’s self-worth. She was daily reminded of failure to measure up and it haunted her long after her parents passing .
Mom carried a distorted image God never intended her to gaze upon .She learned of God’s love early on in life while sitting on a little bench in the basement of Minthorne Church’s Sunday school class. But, her heart never fully recovered from the deeply embedded favoritism wounds that plagued her all her life. Her tenacious love for God did enable her to overcome many hardships and disappointments she encountered along the way . And,God’s love gave her wisdom and courage not to repeat the same mistake of showing favoritism and comparison towards my brother and me.
When we look a the definition of favoritism , ” the unfair practice of treating some people better than others,” we know it’s contrary to God’s nature. Numerous Scriptures underline this intrinsic truth of His loving character. Romans 2.11 reminds us ” God shows no partiality .” He is no respecter of persons . Peter exploded with this good news when God revealed there was not distinction between Jew or Gentile. All are grafted into the same tree. He declares in Acts 10.34 It’s Gods own truth ; nothing could be plainer :God plays no favorites ! It makes no difference who you are or where you are from. If you want God and are ready to do as he says, the door is open .” (Message)
How freeing it is to belong to such a merciful and loving Papa, who does not compare or measure,raise a high standard or base His love on conditions.
Today I rejoice in the legacy of my mother’s loving choices against favoritism. I am thankful to a God who declares we are all His favorite.
Published by The Christian Journal May 2014 Lisa Thompson Jennings
Janet and I were neighbors and all around best buddies, our closeness evident by the telltale photo of the matching outfits we sported on our grade school field trip to OMSI. We completed our wardrobe down to the lucky rabbits foot dangling from our Levi belt loop’s. Really, how lucky could that poor rabbit have been? When I think of Janet my mind is flooded with happy memories and funny stories, they are like brilliant stars nestled in a night sky of gratefulness. A treasured childhood friend to share silliness and secrets, whether walking to school, playing together, or during sleepovers; experiencing laughter till our sides hurt brought on by our countless goofy ways we could amuse ourselves.
One of our favorite games was playing Montgomery Wards catalog, in our day (which sounds incredibly old ) you could pick up and return your orders to the Mall 205 Ward’s store. During that age they relied on employee customer service and good old fashion handwritten files to keep track of it all. What fun it was to play after school, setting up shop downstairs on my parents covered pool table. A toy pink phone for imaginary calls… check, a Ward’s catalog… check, files made up with fake names like Frank Frone… check, all the proper tools to ignite our wild imaginations. Why we never worked at Montgomery Ward’s when we got older I will never know. We had serious mad skills I tell you!
Some of our other memories were going door to door collecting money for the Christian Children’s Fund. One time, we chose to clean the handwritten graffiti from bathroom stalls during recess just for fun! Each school week was occasionally mingled with some mischief… at times less than angelic. Rounding out our Friday’s with our hit single we belted out our song, “We’re going home today, today, today!! ushering in our weekend. It makes me giggle at the very thought of it.
One moment we walked to grade school as children, next thing you know we were catching the bus to Junior High with the first stroke of blush applied to our cheeks. Time flew by but the memories linger remaining a steady source of joy. Recently, while at the check stand I was gazing at the outrageous tabloids that slander and exploit people without grace or kindness. I wondered how does one being attacked handle such lies, falsehoods and slander without being able to tell their side of the story? A two sided coin only baring one side oblivious to the other side’s details.
We have all struggled with hurtful and untrue stories told that slammed against the walls of our integrity. Casting suspicion on our foundation we hold so dear. Sometimes, I am guilty of setting my eyes on only one side being represented, believing that to be the whole truth without hearing the other side.
As I wrestle with my own personal pain from untruthfulness spun against me, it presses me into seeking endurance for the injustices. Causing me to mumble this question to myself as I unloaded my shopping cart ” How do they do it God? I gently heard the words “thick skin” rise up in my spirit, and the memories of how Janet and I had a pre-summer ritual.
Before summer arrived we would prepare our tender feet for the freedom of barefoot days by toughening them up. Our solution: A “foot boot camp” without boots. These tender feet that were previously cradled in warm socks and comfortable shoes, barely seeing the light of day, would be exposed not only to the sunlight but the dark hard asphalt and rough cement, going… “all natural”. Quickly acclimating our tender soles to lessen the nuisance of feeling every poke and jab of the harsh ground beneath. Thus, giving way to a foot loose and fancy free summer!
It made so much sense to me back then, and it so applicable to me now. My tender heart and thin skin feels every poke and jab of harshness and disapproval of others toward me, focusing my attention on my wounded soul. Instead, I want to use these opportunities to develop a thick skin of grace foregoing being callous to their deep woundedness. This allows me the freedom to enjoy the green pastures the Lord leads me to. His endless glory stretched out beneath my eager feet. His glowing canopy of approval and forgiveness gives me the strength to say, *1 “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” *2 “Being able to throw open our doors to God and discover at that same moment that He has already thrown open his door to us. We find ourselves standing where we always hoped we might stand–out in the wide open spaces of God’s grace and glory, standing tall and shouting our praises… with our Tender Hearts and Thick Skins.
The sun is shining brilliantly outside my window while robust winds toss trees seemingly without mercy and downright relentless. Inside my feet dangle freely and rather comfortably positioned right over a toasty register unaware of the robust gales outside. As I ponder these mighty winds our beloved city of Troutdale is know for displaying, I’ve come to conclude with great conviction I might add, Chicago could have strong competition holding the title of “The Windy City” if it was ever up for grabs. This little town is proving to be one heck of powerful contender thanks to the east winds whipping through the Columbia River Gorge. If by chance we were in Christopher Robin’s neck of the woods. Winnie the Pooh would call this a “blustery day” indeed. However, my mind is contemplating and pondering more then the breeze that rattled the windows ,but instead what the rest of the day holds. Feeling my spirits being churned equally as the unsettled blasts of winds presently a mere stones throw from my cozy indoor haven .
For later today my husband and I have plans to visit my brother at his Alzheimer care facility where he now resides. Each visit bracing myself expecting to experience storm tossed, squally feelings of loss. Deep longing for days gone by when my brother and I could laugh and communicate more freely. Far before illness sprawled graffiti painted words such as limitation on the walls of his life. Trying through it all to hear the heart of God over my redundant and deafening questions of why. Why this Lord?, why now ?, why him.? Aware for now these why questions are left unanswered. Regardless, I know I’m not alone for many of you can relate to the wrestling thoughts of your personal whys? Maybe it’s the why of an illness, a painful divorce, a heartbreaking death, or some other tragic loss? Perhaps you don’t ask the why’s like I do being aware that focusing on them is usually not very helpful. There is a key to greater understanding whenever I pause to fix my gaze at the bigger picture called eternity… glimmering with all its’ truth shining brightly before me. Laura Story’s song, “Blessings” is one of my favorites, every time I hear it I sing along in full of appreciation of its’ profound lyrics… some of it goes as follows…
“What if my greatest disappointment or the aching of this life , Is the revealing of the greater thirst this world can’t satisfy and what if the trails in this life … the rain, the storm the hardest nights are your mercies in disguise.”
Laura wrote “Blessings ” after a brain tumor hospitalized her husband in 2006 it was a stormy time for them and the road to recovery that followed. When being interviewed by Kevin Davis of NRT she shared, “The song shows that we still have more questions than answers. But there’s a decision that I find God is asking us to make. Are we going to judge God based on our circumstances or are we going to choose to interpret our circumstances based on what we hold to be true about God”?
Walking in a temporal world repeatedly asking the why’s tosses my soul back and forth blasting my faith with its’ billowing windstorms. Speaking from experience I have a battered soul to prove it. However, today if I choose to walk again with a determined faith making a sincere conscious effort to take each day as a gift. Knowing full well God’s mercies are new every morning, embracing more completely the here and now with all the messes and heartache that can accompany it. Trying my best to refrain from asking a copious amount of ” The 5 W+ H” of Journalist questions to God… consisting of Who, What, When, Where, Why, How… settling wholly on the bottom line alone. What is that you may ask? If we know who God is, and what are His promises… the When, Where, Why and How with lose prominence. God is Love, God is Just, God is Faithful, to name a few. We can boldly look to Jesus the Author and Finisher of our faith. Whether it’s sunny, windy or both we can rejoice… turning our maze of questions into an a “mazing” trust, *painting grace graffiti on the fences of our limitations and losses.
Lord you know how I need you, Your truth, grace, hope and joy. Casting my cares upon you for you care for me.
“The Future is, of all things, the thing least like eternity. It is the most temporal part of time–for the Past is frozen and no longer flows, and the Present is all lit up with eternal rays.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters
“For the Present is the point at which time touches eternity. C.S. Lewis The Screwtape Letters
True confessions .. I’m a bling girl, yes that’s right, admiring shinny, glittery, sparkling things just like a pack rat. Drawn to them like a moth attracted to a flame. Oohing and aahing their sparkle and gleam. No need for the real McCoy, let the imitations shine on! What joy would be mine if I were to be the proud owner of a BeDazzler, the official rhinestone setter of all things glitzy. I could “Be Dazzle” almost anything… my dear friend owned one of these marvels, however,lamentably was cut short by her unamused husband hiding this man made wonder machine. Woefully being charged guilty of excessive bedazzlement. How could you not? The ad lures you with the promise… “it’s easy, It’s fun and it’s fabulous” ! A Win, Win, and can we all say a rousing Win!
Recently, the Bedazzler has been on my mind, triggered by my friend Jen’s roller skating event at Oaks Park amusement center. My husband and I had the joy of watching her perform, all of us hoping that she would earn a spot to compete at Nationals. Oaks Park holds a special place in my heart , brimming with family history. In 1948 the Vanport flood which caused the roller rink to be submerged under water for 30 days. Afterwards, it prompted the owners to rebuild the rink on pontoons. They design was created to have a detachable floating wooden skate rink floor in case of flooding, of which my grandfather helped build.
While in the 1950’s my mom and her sister Donna performed elaborate skating shows. Their photos still line the wall above the skate rental shop.
Gazing at these nostalgic pictures rekindled sweet memories of my mother and years gone by. While waiting for Jeni to skate we seized a few Kodak moments. Jen’s next routine would be to the music “Stomp” an upbeat lively number using drumsticks as her prop. Wearing an adorable outfit she designed in true Bedazzlement fashion; the outfit dotted liberally with rhinestones. What a perfect addition to make her shine on the rink’s wooden floor… as if her performance and smile were not enough.
I’m brought to deep thoughts on the magical bedazzler, just as it can add sparkle and life to an otherwise ordinary piece fabric, so to, deep spirited friends add the sparkle we need to the fabric of our lives.
The dictionary’s description of bedazzled is to “impress forcefully, especially so to make oblivious to faults or shortcomings”. Heartfelt friends applaud your positive attributes while graciously loving you regardless of your faults and shortcomings. Thus, giving you a desire to rise higher, empowering you to assess some personal areas that need attention and growth. Your spirit embellished with love and jewels of grace, visibly glowing treasures from your divine friendship.
Biblically, stones have been known to represent truth, used as boundaries marked off by stones. Also used as witnesses to God’s loving faithfulness when Jacob set up a pillar in Gen. 28:22; 35:14. Aaron’s priestly ephod and breastplate were bedazzled with precious stones, holy truths glistening God’s love, set in stone for his people.
HOW DO YOU TAKE YOUR LIFE FROM DULL TO DAZZLING? Get to know the heart of God for you.. reading His life giving words of love and through the lives of true, deep spirited friends. Captivating you with their ability to add sparkle and shine to your world. If you don’t have friends like that yet, I pray that God will send you one as quickly as you can say… BeDazzle.
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Lord, help me be a friend to others as I would like for myself. Thank you that friends are a gift from you and your word says: “when you give a gift you add no sorrow to it”. We rejoice today in your love and the love of our friends whether from the past, present, or future.
“If instead of a gem, or even a flower, we should cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart of a friend, that would be giving as the angels give”.
Time was well overdue to remove the molehills that popped up in our front yard nestling up against the curb. The desire to spruce up our flower beds before spring was now joined with increased pressure to rescue my early blooming crocuses now completely smothered in mole mania. This pesky mole burrowing upward caused the crocuses delicate foliage to croak under the mountain of fresh tillage.
Rather hating to admit it, I was ever so slightly admiring this particular mole’s astute sense of focus. Managing to erupt orderly mounts in unerring rows while tunneling through our sod. Somehow he was able to keenly and systematically dot neighboring property with the same impeccable streamline mastery. Though I marveled that he was a gentleman of order, the mounding piles of dirt were still a blight on our lawn. It had been suggested by a friend that this was the work of more then one mole; if this was indeed the case, their impressive team work scores a virtuoso 10. Whatever the scenario, it was nothing short of a stellar performance. Earlier, I momentarily reveled in their beauty when the heaps of soil were graced with a light dusting of snow. These works of art resembled a miniature Rocky Mountain Range along our curb. Finding this to be a rare occasion to acceptably make a snow covered mountain out of a molehill.
Shortly after removing the mounts of dirt it seemed to my joy and relief they had blazed a trail off into the sunset. As you can tell by what you have read already, I’m nowhere near being mole savvy. By far, I lack the full knowledge of what these little critters are capable of doing. Let’s just say I greatly underestimated my opponent, this startling truth became painfully evident as I gazed upon my recent edged and weeded walkway. Gasping at what my eyes were beholding… a fresh knoll of dirt burying my crocuses yet again!
Highly disappointed that my one little patch of orderliness was no longer in order, wrestling an all to familiar lie that tidiness should magically stay tidy,well for at least 24 hours, right ?. And when you cross it off your to do list it should stay done. By now you would think that my twenty one years of being a stay at home, raising and homeschooling our two boys, would have debunked this elephant size fib. Surely, I should have gotten that all too important memo. Truth is, in my heart of hearts. I know the 411. Life is messy and your 100% guaranteed “do overs” are things like dishes, laundry and other assortment of daily chores.
A confessing slow learner by nature, regretfully being revealed yet again by my increased anxiety over this disheveled patch of a nearly perfect garden utopia. When such emotional intensity flies into my radar it warrants further examination as to why I’m experiencing the growing tension.
Recently, I decided to discuss this dilemma with my dear friend Kelli over lunch. She patiently listened as I dined away on my firecracker chicken. Hoping to grasp the truth of my underlying issue far better than my novice maneuvering of chopsticks. My spirit was hopeful because when we seek God we find Him and the truth is revealed, as Kelli and I continued our conversation we were grateful for His faithfulness. Without a doubt I’m sure He was perfectly content and thoroughly delighted to mingle in our laughter, tickled as we pondered Him, and was not distressed one bit at my raw emotions. So grateful for God given gift of authentic, deep spirited friendships. At that moment I caught a glorious revelation exposed; it was necessary to pull back further from my “tunnel vision” fitting for a mole. Once again, God spoke His truth over a well worn path of misconceptions.
Like the moles reappearance so had the flair up my of irksome Achilles heels… one heel throbbing need for perfection the other aching with the distortion of destination rather than journey mentality. So rapid to appear, stirring up my spirit to become disquieted, my thoughts distorted and routed for dissatisfaction instead of paths of peace that surpass all understanding. All because I chose to make mountains out of meager molehills.
I love what Zechariah 4:7 says
“For who are you, O great mountain [of human obstacles]? Before Zerubbabel you shall become a plain [a mere [a]molehill]! And he shall bring forth the finishing gable stone [of the new temple] with loud shouting of the people, crying, Grace, grace to it!
God makes a molehill out of our mountains. Oh, how I long to trust Him with mine.
Verse 6 chpt. 4 Zechariah says how we can achieve this:
“Not by might, nor by power, but by My Spirit [of Whom the oil is a symbol], says the Lord of hosts.”
So, until I get the problematic mole(s) eradicated for good, I will choose to let those mounts of earth remind me that God’s turning my mountains of troubles into mere molehills while saying His grace is sufficient. This comforts my heart that I’m loved without performing or arriving, but simply being His daughter… the same holds true for everyone.
Do you have a looming mountain of human obstacles in your way? May we move forward in God’s power and might declaring His promise together saying … So big mountain,who do you think you are ? you’re nothing but a molehill!.
Awhile back my husband and I watched Steve and Geoff the “Meteorite Men ” trek through barren and high altitudes parts of the Chilean Desert called the Imilac Strewnfeilds, as far as the eye could see it looked lifeless to me. I’m not a big fan of the desert, however if you add an extra S to desert it becomes the word dessert and that I am a huge fan of. I did become enthralled with the whole process, seeing that void stretch of Terra ferma reminded me of my life at times. When my spirit feels barren, arid and lifeless, the grit of my circumstance blurring my vision no longer being able to see any evidence of value or purpose in the wasteland of suffering. How comforting to know even in our desert times of feeling spiritually dry, parched by life’s scorching trials. God sees the value, the nuggets of truth, tried by the fire and ready to mine the deposits left by our painful feelings of loss and devastation. Steve and Geoff were excited with the possibilities…they saw the gold mine that lay at their dusty boots, armed with magnetic devices and keen eyes they gushed at the wealth they were beholding, one precious rough rock at a time. So too God mines our souls sweeping across them with the powerful attraction of His Grace, stooping down to marvel at the beauty and value of which we often mistake as worthless. Beauty for ashes, life spoken over the dry bones, humanity formed from dust …. God’s redemption in the most drought stricken and lifeless situations. How precious to have such a loving Father as he; to see the value when we see none, to rejoice over what the world would overlook.
Heavenly Father and miner of our souls, thank you for knowing first hand the value in suffering. As we travel through the desert times may your well traveled hand guide us with your truths and water our weary and torrid soul’s. May our mind be refreshed in your promises and the hope that one day we will be coming up out of the wilderness times leaning on our beloved; and just as the iron entered Joseph’s soul when he was chained with fetters. Make us strong, fortified with your walls of love, seeing beyond the pain to your exceedingly bright and precious promises. Thus, knowing that you make all things work together for our good. From glory to glory, one priceless nugget at a time….
Matthew Henry commentary says, “Afflictions are among our mercies. They prove our faith and love, they humble our pride, they wean us from the world, and quicken our prayers”
“Let the thankful heart sweep through the day and as the magnet finds iron, so it will find, in every hour some heavenly blessing.” Henry Ward Beecher
Isaiah 43:19…”Behold, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it and will you not give heed to it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”
