My sentimental journey

An ordinary girl's walk with an extraordinary God.


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Lucky U

While anxiously waiting for my counseling appointment which I had extended an olive branch for a family member to attend, my hopes were high to come to a peaceful resolution.  It was time for the wise counseling of a professional to help  repair the severed relationship. Beginning the process of mending torn emotions to a place of strength and deeper healing.  Like tiny tears of muscle that pave the way to increased muscle mass, so too our relationship would optimistically be built up.  As my upcoming appointment drew near the prayer of King David in Psalms 139 :23-24 came to mind,  “Search me thoroughly O God, and know my heart ! Try me and know my thoughts. And see if there is any wicked or hurtful ways in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”   Longing that my heart would  stay on the  course of truth  joined hand and hand in love.

As the meeting came to a close, regretfully the outcome was not what we had hoped for. Deeply wrestling with discouragement the ride home was a somber one. Feeling an intensified and rather profound sense of loss, 2012 was closing its chapter to more sorrow then I had  ever bargained for. My mom’s congestive heart failure, increasing dementia, while also mourning  my only other sibling health challenges.  And now the golden thread of hope of restoration severed, swaying frayed and raw, making the approaching holidays more poignant with overwhelming sadness and grief.

Upon arriving safely at home I was greeted with a  rousing welcome from my loving husband, thoughtful son and two exuberant and lavishly affectionate dogs, Buddy and Buttons. My soul and body instantly sinking into a cozy place called home, their listening ears slowly warming my chilly spirits, thawing out the cold harsh situation. Shortly after our conversation the phone rang, it was Lawrence the husband of my dear friend Lisa from high school calling to plan a surprise for her birthday the following day. His cleverly devised plan was as follows….First, his limo driver would pick us up, then swing over to their house for the birthday girl, surprising her when she got inside with my unannounced presence.  After that, it was time to drive to the Chart House for Lawrence’s company party.  Photos were taken and hugs exchanged then off my husband and I went for over a two hour ride in the limo….all for free! Her husband’s generosity extending not only to his lovely wife but a gift to Kevin and I as well.

It’s safe to say that it’s been well over twenty six years since I have yearned to ride in a limousine with my husband. The odds never  looked good considering for twenty one of those years we have lived only on one income, while I stayed home, homeschooling our two boys, coupon clipping, bargain hunting and pinching pennies tell they squealed.  Honesty, that desire got placed so far on the back burner, I forgot it was still a simmering dream. However, God is mindful of our dormant dreams, His  word promising to give us the desires of our heart.  That same joy of watching my precious friend’s elation on her special day, so too God rejoices over us, watching our astonishment at His glorious celebration on our behalf. This was truly a magical night of sparkling cider toasts, birthday gifts and photos. Then the two of us riding in high style touring Christmas lights, gazing at twinkling stars and city lights from the heights of Rocky Butte. Finishing our glorious night eating at the same Denny’s where we first met after a college career church gathering… sharing french fries like we did thirty years ago. This wondrous adventure fulfilled in a Limo with the License plate,  “LUCKY  U”

Perhaps you too are struggling with a painful hurt or loss?  Do you feel like the chips are down and down on your luck?  May I encourage today with the promise of a God who knows your heart and heartache. He is a God that binds up the brokenhearted repairing and restoring them to wholeness.  His favor and grace resting on the broken and downtrodden. So, whether you find yourself in a luxury Limo ride or not, the Lord wants to bless you  knowing the secret petitions of your heart. This for sure, we serve a mighty God that daily loads His children with benefits.  With this profound  truth I lift my glass of sparkling cider with a toast in honor of a very highly favored and… LUCKY U


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Beauty in our Barren Places

ImageAwhile back my husband and I  watched  Steve and Geoff the “Meteorite Men ” trek through  barren and high altitudes parts of  the Chilean Desert called the Imilac Strewnfeilds,  as far as the eye could see it looked  lifeless to me.  I’m not a big fan of the desert, however if you add an extra S to desert it becomes the word dessert and that I am a huge fan of.  I did  become enthralled  with the whole process, seeing that  void stretch of Terra ferma  reminded me of my life at times.  When my spirit  feels barren, arid and lifeless, the  grit  of my  circumstance blurring my vision  no longer  being  able to see any evidence of value or purpose in the wasteland of suffering. How comforting to know even in our desert times of feeling  spiritually dry, parched by life’s scorching trials. God sees  the  value, the nuggets of truth, tried by the fire and ready to mine the deposits left by our painful feelings of loss and devastation.     Steve and Geoff were excited with the possibilities…they saw the gold mine that lay at their dusty boots, armed with magnetic devices and keen eyes they gushed at the wealth they were beholding, one precious rough rock  at a time. So too  God mines our souls sweeping across them with the powerful attraction of His Grace, stooping down to marvel at the beauty and value of  which we often mistake as worthless.  Beauty for ashes, life spoken over the dry bones, humanity formed from dust …. God’s redemption in the most  drought stricken  and lifeless situations.  How precious to have such a loving Father as he; to see the value  when we see none, to rejoice over what the world would overlook.
Heavenly Father and miner of our souls, thank you for knowing first hand  the value in suffering.  As we travel through the desert times may your well traveled hand guide us with  your truths and  water our weary and torrid soul’s.  May our mind be refreshed in your promises and the hope that one day we will be coming up out of the wilderness times leaning on our beloved; and just as the  iron entered Joseph’s  soul when he was chained with fetters.  Make us strong, fortified with your walls of love, seeing beyond the pain to your exceedingly bright and precious promises.  Thus,  knowing that you make all things work together for our good.  From glory to glory, one  priceless nugget at a time….

Matthew Henry commentary says, “Afflictions are among our mercies. They prove our faith and love, they humble our pride, they wean us from the world, and quicken our prayers”

“Let the thankful heart sweep through the day and as the magnet finds iron, so it will find, in every hour some heavenly blessing.” Henry Ward Beecher

Isaiah 43:19…”Behold, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs forth; do you not perceive and know it and will you not give heed to it? I will even make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”