My Sentimental Journey

An ordinary girl's walk with an extraordinary God


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Entwined Hearts

Recently it dawned on me, jokingly calling the word “wait” a four letter word was not a good idea. Though there have been times in my life when waiting felt like a long prison sentence with no hope of parole nor even a visitor called Joy. It’s root cause was fostered by my lack of trust and complete confidence in God’s faithfulness. Not only that, my thoughts were skipping the biblical principles of rejoicing in the Lord always as Philippians 4:1-9 encourages us to do so… this didn’t help matters. My notions of God’s truths in regards to waiting was conceived, birthed and nursed on lies. This false narrative continued to grow out of a lack of trust in God’s goodness. Doubt became the framework of my wobbly emotional structure, which proved insufficient building materials to fully lean on God’s goodness in my times of waiting. Removing the core nature of God’s faithfulness out of the equation of waiting, choosing to be dictated by feelings over our faith will fail any faith building inspection.

I’m reminded of Peter’s bold steps to walk on water as Jesus bid him, only to suddenly let his fear and doubt not only stop him in his water tracks but sank him in it. I love what Matthew 14:31 * says, ” Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him .” You of little faith, ‘he said , why did you doubt? “So why did Peters bold step of faith to met Jesus abruptly stop? He saw the wind which had produced the crashing waves against the boat he and the other 11 apostles were waiting in. Peter’s fear of the wind caused him to take His eyes off Jesus, gripping his heart with doubt causing him to sink. Even though Jesus had comforted His fearful disciples only moments before while He was walking on the water saying, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.” I’m comforted to know that even Peter doubted in the waiting, letting sight override faith allowing doubt to drown him… even though Jesus had lived amongst him on a daily basis with unwavering faithfulness. Like me, he let the whirlwind of circumstances deceive him, while the wind of adversity whipped up fear that raged in his soul.


Also, I find it interesting that in Matt: 14 it is recorded on three different occasions that immediately after Jesus did something for his disciples a juxtaposition took place… the value of “Waiting”. God is a God of Waiting and a God of suddenlies, though I love the suddenlies there is great significance in the Waiting. Allowing the necessary work of the Holy Spirit within our own hearts’ and minds’ to be done while we Wait. James W. Goll writes, “when the fullness of preparation, meets the fullness of time its results in the culture or atmosphere where suddenlies come to pass” The bottom line is …. “He has made everything beautiful in its time.” Ecclesiastes 3 :11 ESV


This reality of God’s truth empowers us to take a position of rejoicing in His exceedingly great and precious promise even while we Wait.


As I repented on my four letter word comparison of the word WAIT the Lord brought to mind the countless scripture verses that celebrates Waiting.

The truth is we not only wait on Him, He waits on us.


To surrender our will for His.


To lay on the altar those things we cling to. Offering our bodies as living sacrifices holy and pleasing to God.


A beautiful exchange of earthly pleasures for His far greater kingdom purposes.


Isaiah 30 :18 is a lovely picture of His waiting on us.”For this reason the Lord is still waiting to show his favor to you so he can show you his marvelous love. He waits to be gracious to you. He sits on his throne ready to show mercy to you. For Yahweh is the Lord of justice, faithful to keep his promises. Overwhelmed with bliss are all who will entwine their hearts in him, waiting for him to help them.”


Such a comforting verse, and the thought of entwining our hearts to His is a powerful truth to cling to in our waiting.
” Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting—for he will never disappoint you!” Psalm 27:14


The Passion translation commentary writes The Hebrew word most commonly translated as “wait” (wait upon the Lord) is qavah, which also means “to tie together by twisting” or “to entwine” or “to wrap tightly.” This is a beautiful concept of waiting upon God, not passively, but entwining our hearts with him and his purposes.


It reminds me of a tall curly willow branch propped up behind our shed waiting to be used, while in its stillness a glorious honeysuckle near by seeking additional support, twirled around the dead lifeless branch. Gracefully, beautifully entwining its purpose with life and destiny.

Today you might feel like a dead branch waiting for a promise or a purpose, I have good news for you… when we wrap our heart into His we are forever changed in the process and beauty will come out of the waiting.

Perhaps you too are tired of being on the team where wait is a four letter word. Are you ready for a shift into freedom? I know I am!

As I wrote this the Lord brought to mind the game called “Olly olly oxen free”.”Olly olly oxen free” is a catchphrase or truce term used in children’s games such as hide and seek, indicating the players who are hiding can come out into the open without losing the game. Or that the position of the sides in a game has changed, meaning the game is entirely over. Wikipedia went on to say the phrase may have, ”calling all the outs in free”; in other words, all who are out may come in without penalty.


We thank you Lord for calling “Olly olly oxen free ” to all who are hiding in fear, doubt or shame. Being the glorious game changer, calling outs–IN and those still waiting will one day boldly declare… it was totally worth the Wait! .


“I have wrapped my heart into yours!” Psalms 25:5 TPT

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Dancing with Possibilities

                                                       

Through the years I have thought it would be fun to own a little boutique, well at least in theory. I did however get the joy of renting a couple booths for seven years selling home decor with a shabby chic flare. This gave me a very little taste of what having my own boutique would feel like; without all the extra responsibilities. It was a delightful chapter in my life. I also realized how much I enjoy driving by empty buildings seeing in my minds eye the potential of what those little gems could hold. A hidden jewel ready and waiting to come out of the box shining with their new found glory and purpose. An empty building with budding futures are not the only things my heart is drawn to, so too is a strong pull for discarded furniture and other roadside freebies that get me every time. Putting on the breaks, jumping out, I’m absolutely giddy as I drag my new found treasure to the van. Like a hermit crab eager to get a discarded shell, I celebrate my new found treasure all the way home.

This love affair of discarded things has tested my limits of how far I will go to get the prize. Having your eye on the prize of something you cannot lift into your car without help is always met with a prayer. Like for instance, a gorgeous large mid century dresser nestled amongst the landscape on a sloping hill. Challenge accepted and prayers were raised as I pathetically tried to scoot that behemoth of a dresser to my van. Fortunately some strapping young man took pity on this grandma’s feeble attempts and kindly offered his must needed muscle. Thank you Jesus! That “Lord have mercy prayer” worked beautifully that day.

Once again it came in handy when I saw the cutest small wooden tool shed needing a good home. There it was smack dab in the middle of the sidewalk beckoning me. I wasted no time heeding the call and quickly turned the van around parking it close enough or so I thought, ready to get that darling loaded up. As I stood next to this 6 ft beauty I assessed my game plan realizing leaving it there was not an option. So I hugged it, like you would a tree and since we were cozy I thought waltzing with it back and forth was far better to get it from point A to B, then pulling it to the van. Besides I did not want to appear rude upon our first meeting.

Choosing to dance slowly…

With the cumbersome,

Embracing all its possibilities,

Awkwardness mingled with its underlining glory,

Investing in a risk to reap an even greater reward.

No doubt I looked completely hilarious and ridiculous at the same time and yet I did not care. I knew the value and the purpose of what I choose as my unusual dance partner. Swaying with a shed to no music down the looooong stretch of Arata Road was worth the risk and reward. Finally, arriving at my van seemed like forever, a sweet lady was gracious enough to put down her bucket of popcorn realizing the “Dancing With The Shed” was over and gladly helped me hoist my new found partner into my vehicle. Finding help in the 11th hour was a pleasant surprise though I’m not going to lie, having help sooner would have been nice. Another prayer answered brought to you by God’s sense of humor and believe me He has one. This story is always funny to remember and so its all good in the hood. Besides our small towns motto is, “Everything you need in one square mile”, apparently that includes entertainment. Your welcome!

I still love the thrill of the hunt, finding treasures once deemed as trash never gets old. Seeing beauty in the unwanted, discarded and at times seemingly unlovable is in my DNA. Like the time my high school boyfriend took his dad’s beautiful white Jaguar spending the day traveling dusty roads collecting bottles and cans for money. Truth be told… we spent more money on gas then what we earned. On top of that his dad was not pleased with our joy ride, nor was my mom as I washed a bazillion dirty mainly beer cans on our front lawn. She was completely mortified the neighbors would think this God loving,church going, teetotaling mama had been hiding a big secret. What a day!

Lately this gal’s DNA pendulum of seeing worth in rejected items is swinging way beyond dirty beer cans and discarded furniture to more of the human condition. My passion has shifted even more recently turning 60, coupled with personally experiencing a greater depth of emotional and spiritual freedom. This has sparked such a hunger in me to see others completely healed and made whole. Bottom line… God is moving me into a new season enlarging my heart to break it for what breaks His. So excited and …

Ready …

To embrace the possibilities,

To dance with new opportunities even when difficult.

To look at situations that seem to big for me only …

To realize they are not to big for God.

Today by faith I chose to welcome the awkward, the messy, learning to love more deeply the broken, the discarded and what the world sees as unlovable. My heart’s desire is to have the same zeal that had me pull over for a piece of unwanted furniture to now stopping more as the Holy Spirit directs me to help a brother or sister in need. Seeing their intrinsic God given value, a beauty that is in desperate need of redemption and healing.

Through Gods love and boundless grace we are more then able to …

Change the trajectory from wounded people wounding people

to the liberating truth propelling free people to free people.

Now I look more for people than things that need some TLC. Perhaps to give a warm smile (even with a mask ) for our eyes smile too!, a hug, a prayer, or an encouraging word. Every person needs to know the Tender Loving Care of their Heavenly Father who wants to speak into their lives …

They have worth

They have value

They have a God given identity that is waiting to be uncovered from lies that they are buried under.

Thank you Jesus for the joy of walking in true freedom that can only come from you. May our lives be conduits to speak life and truth of just how good you are. Pouring out your love, grace and hope of our brightest future that comes from you the Author and Finisher of our faith.

Now that is truly music I can dance to.

Let us not only embrace new possibilities and seasons but kick up our heels and dance with them . Lisa Jennings

“Be cheerful with joyous celebration in every season of life.” Philippians 4 :1

“The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is to love and be loved in return.” Natalie Cole

A broken thing can’t fix itself ~ Dean Koontz